Making it through surgery seemed like a decade ago, a radical double mastectomy. No one can prepare a human being for " you have breast cancer". Miraculously, as a patient, you go from: in for a routine mammogram one day to the call from your general practitioner to a breast cancer surgeon then MRI. No thinking involved you are scheduled for another foreign procedure, an out patient biopsy. My mind starts racing, "not now! I just recently divorced", "who will love me through this?", or "no one will hold me and I am alone." Fortunately, I had the kids and my mother around when I got the call. The rest has literally been what I had never known, a blur.
Being diagnosed in November, Thanksgiving and Christmas were not what I had planned. Everything falling apart, I am in so much pain, some emotional and some physical. And, it began to feel like cancer. Interesting I have found, it is ironic, some life situations feel like cancer.
Truly, I believe this is true because I live it. Maybe the reason I made it through chemotherapy like I was taking Advil is because a part of my life is worse than cancer. Currently undergoing radiation until July, 5 days a week, I stand by these words "Isn't it ironic". How I have been fighting through emotional cancer. And, just a novice at the physical breast and lymph cancers. In my world, I will take breast cancer over emotional cancer, all day long.
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